And if you wait, really wait until they’re ready, they’ll be one of the kids that is potty trained in three days. Ahhh, could a BIG BOY BED be the long-term reward that would work? 4 year old potty training woes. Because they sleep in the same room, it was a daily reminder that his brother got to sleep in a big boy bed because he was “a big boy.”. Let’s face it, Pull Ups get to be very expensive over time. Unfortunately, this practice actually caused more problems and accidents with children who were not ready to be potty trained. From that day on, he was really interested in using the potty. Your child may not even think of going in their pants anymore when he/she gets so used to going on the potty. Ask your child if he wants to go potty “Just like little Johnnie at school.” Avoid engaging in negotiations or a battle of the wills with your 4-year-old. This might mean waiting until your little boy is 4 years old. He’d go #2 in the toy room and then come back acting like nothing had happened. She is a bright girl and has no obvious special needs but refuses to use the potty/toilet and seems afraid of growing up - always saying that she does not want to get bigger or go to school and talks about when she was a baby and the things she had and toys she played with almost as if she wants to be a baby again. This is not to say your child has a problem, however there could be some underlying factors keeping your four year old from the potty. ... My 2 and a half year old still not talking: 2.5 year old still not talking in sentences: 2 year old still not sleeping through the night: Nearly 14 months old - nap time: old. The 4yr old IS NOT POTTY TRAINED. We told him that if he didn’t continue going on the potty, we’d put him back in his toddler bed. And he will pee everywhere. It might just signal your four year old is maturing slower than other children. I don't know what else to do. We just adopted a 4.5yr old & almost 2.5yr old. So, more parents are waiting for the child to become interested. I became amazed. Each child is different and should never be pressured to use the potty. When we got back from vacation, we put our potty trained eldest son in a single bed. We let him pick out his underwear. At least we were prepared for the glorious day when he would decide to use it. We told our 4 yr old son (who refused to become fully potty trained) that he could sleep in a big boy bed when he started to go potty every day. We told him that Santa would bring him a big boy bed if he continued to go potty every day. Instead, explain that it's her responsibility to get her pee and poop in the toilet. I have been trying to potty train DD1 since she was 3 years old. May 21, 2018 by Joanne Schweitzer Leave a Comment. It actually is not abnoral for an almost 4 year old, especially a boy, to not be potty trained. Think again! Instant Pot Easy Hamburger Soup in 20 Min! You may also offer rewards, praise, and encouragement but never reproach your child for accidents or be forceful. I know it's not my job, but something has got to give. When he turned 3, we put him in preschool 3 days per week and I noticed his morning poop was held until he got home. We told him that only big boys could sleep in big boy beds and big boys don’t use Pull Ups. Our boy was waking up with dry Pull Ups long before he turned 4 yrs old. I didn’t push the potty training issue while he was still 3 yrs old because his pediatrician told me he had until 4 yrs old before I should worry. Learning how to potty train a stubborn 4 year old boy or a stubborn toddler can seem a little bit cruel, but when push comes to shove it has to get done.. I waited and felt that when I found the right reward, he would go on the potty all of the time with no problems. Should My 4 Year Old Be Potty-Trained By Now. He is fighting potty training like you wouldn't believe. I promise to take you on a plane when you're potty trained." They were both still in toddler beds at home. It might just signal your four year old is maturing slower than other children. Not just pooping, peeing too. And so it began. Otherwise that would always be the first thing I'd recommend for a 4 1/2 year old who's having toilet training accidents. Preschoolers are very verbal and might try to “win” bigger rewards or fabricate excuses. He got excited with the anticipation that one day he’d get to sleep in the big boy bed. Copyright ©2021, No Plate Like Home. asks from Mobile, AL on December 16, 2007 16 answers. The vacation rental had two twin beds in the bedroom in which the boys would be sleeping. At least I got cash back from Ibotta (and you can too) when I was buying Pull Ups. Not his woe, mine! You could buy a fun new potty decorated with Dora or another favorite character of your childs and then say the potty is hers/his and waiting for them to try it out. He started going potty without refusal…and daily. According to your comment the four year old is "Male, not autistic, fully verbal, is fine just going to the bathroom in his pants, it doesn't phase him." Your email address will not be published. I felt like everything I was told to do, wasn’t working. We told our 4 yr old son (who refused to become fully potty trained) that he could sleep in a big boy bed when he started to go potty every day. He had to go in a single bed eventually so, it wasn’t a stretch to have to get one. So use nighttime pull-ups until they are fully potty trained, and don't panic if it takes until they are 4 or even 5 to make it through the night. What Age is Best for Potty Training? Once everyone is ready, potty training will be an easy and positive experience. Sometimes, it helps to keep your child from drinking liquids after supper, but often it doesn’t (and kids need to stay hydrated, anyway). Make sure he has the right gear to help him poop properly, including “distractions” like toys or … You have to be potty trained. Although, if your four year old child does not begin showing interest in the potty soon or is not responsive to any incentives offered to use the potty then perhaps you should take her to a doctor. We went on a summer vacation a couple months before he turned 4 yrs. Transfer responsibility. You need to show less anxiety and pressure and more fun and support if you want to see faster results. I felt confident that when he was ready to go on the potty regularly, he would go and not a day before that. “During the entire school day, which is six hours long, she won’t use bathroom.” Caron goes on to explain that she has created a routine with her daughter that allows her to go to the bathroom at home after school and then use a diaper at night. June 2007. We even bought a portable potty so that we could take it along in the car to help with potty training. If your 4 Year Old Poops In Pants And Doesn’t Care or your 3 year old poops in pants and doesn’t care then you will be in for an uphill struggle. But as you can see, a few simple changes can be all it takes to encourage him to do so. It still took about 4 months and everyday I'd remind him that we'd go on airplane as soon as he could go a whole day with no accidents. But, that only worked when he wanted the short-term reward. Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. From morning till night, you harass and nag me about the potty, but can we just play?" Although, if your four year old child does not begin showing interest in the potty soon or is not responsive to any incentives offered to use the potty then perhaps you should take her to a doctor. Slip a waterproof cover onto the mattress and plan on keeping it there for at least a year after she’s been fully potty-trained. 4 yr old not potty trained. I figured at 4 years old I might be able to reason with him why he should try using the toilet instead of using his training pants as diapers every time. When our little boy turned 4 and was still refusing to go on the potty, I knew I had to find a way and fast. We won! We went looking at youth furniture for both boys. Being soiled doesn't seem to bother him. He certainly knew how to go potty. Once you find that one thing your child wants really badly, most likely you’ll be able to get cooperation with regular use of the potty. If he didn’t feel for a cookie at that particular time, he wouldn’t go potty. In this day in age, I have no clue why her foster parents sat on this for months. He knew how to hold it! Don’t relent. Parmesan Rosemary Air Fryer Roasted Potatoes-6 ingredients, Maryland Lump Crab Cakes with Spicy Tartar Sauce, Air Fryer Panko Coconut Shrimp with Sweet Chili Sauce, One Pot Creole Chicken, Sausage and Shrimp Gumbo, Slow Cooker Chili Recipe with Corn + VIDEO. Have you heard the saying “No one goes to college without being potty trained?” Well, I wasn’t going to wait that long… That’s for sure! “Boys take longer than girls” she said. I'm babysitting for a friend and her 4 year old is not potty trained. We praised him and did the potty dance when he went potty but, it just wan’t enough to get him to go regularly. Thank you so much for this! Even after watching his older brother use the potty, he had no interest in going on the potty unless he would get a cookie or chocolate for it. When a 4 Year Old Won’t Potty Train it can cause increasing tension and frustrations. Find out what that one thing is. Solutions To Your Potty-Training Problems, How To Establish Equal Discipline Between Each Parent. In How to Get a Stubborn 4 Yr Old Child Potty Trained, I’ll tell you how we finally got our 4 yr old stubborn boy potty trained quickly and painlessly in what seemed to be overnight. Updated on May 27, 2010 ... A little background: I have two kids - one 9-1/2 year old daughter and one 4-1/2 year old son. You may feel more pressure to potty train once your son reaches four years old, however, because some schools may require children to be potty trained prior to admittance. Be consistent. There could be a physical problem but probably not. Of course, it can be difficult for parents not to pressure their children to learn to use the potty early especially if they are receiving pressure from their parents or that preschool is about to begin and potty training is required. Yay! }); We respect your privacy. If you make a purchase, I’ll receive a commission. “My 6-year-old daughter has never shown any interest in being potty trained,” says Caron. Although, finding the right reward may not work for every child, it certainly is worth trying. Because the truth is, having a 4 or 5-year who still struggles sometimes with bathroom issues actually isn’t that uncommon. Use this code to sign up for Ibotta. Do not think of it as a failure, but think of as both parent and child are not ready. 4-1/2 Year Old Refuses to Be Potty Trained - Any Suggestions? He had Spiderman briefs and Paw Patrol briefs but, he didn’t want to wear them. First, I want to say that this is not an unusual situation. Your 4 yr. old is refusing to go potty. A 4-year-old doesn't have the maturity to say: "Mom, listen. This type of pediatric incontinence occurs less frequently than nocturnal bed wetting; it typica… It’s free: GOBVMJM. At this time, take a break from potty training for at least three months and revisit it at another time. The years pass and before you know it you have a four year old who is not potty trained. Therefore, find what it is that your child wants badly enough to become potty trained! Keep silent, even when her body language clearly indicates her need to use the toilet. So, now what do you do? Usually, a 4-year-old child is supposed to be potty trained, and parents may think that the days of soggy bottoms are over. By the age of four most children are potty trained during the day while nighttime wetness may still occur. You feel like you’ve tried everything. deleted_user 03/16/2011. If your 3-year-old wets herself twice this week after being dry for eight months, that’s what I call a “bump in the road” — not true regression. Such a bothering issue that 4 year old wetting pants can be quite familiar to many moms. Contrary to popular belief, he is just now hitting the late development for this. These are indicators that the child is not ready to be potty trained. You got this! “4-5 year olds are very busy, and they get absorbed in what they are doing,” Dr. Laura Markham says on Aha! My 4-1/2 year old son is a true blessing - sweet, adorable, super smart and all boy. I have been trying to potty train him for a whole year and he just doesn't care. Secondary diurnal enuresis is daytime urine leakage that occurs in a child who has been potty trained and has successfully stayed dry for minimally three months, notes Dr. Lane Robson, clinical associate professor at the University of South Carolina’s School of Medicine. ... My daughter was day time potty trained at 20 months but still having to wear nappies until she was 5 1/2. All Rights Reserved. Updated on December 26, 2007 A.B. google_ad_client: "ca-pub-5898433522455511", This could be too much pressure from the parents, a fear of the potty, constipation, a cautious personality, fear of failure, or even physical problems. That NEVER happened before. What have you got to lose? However, if your four year old is not yet potty trained this is not necessarily a problem. Girls typically potty train by age 2 1/2 and boys train by age 3, according to extension family life specialist Lesia Oesterreich, with the Iowa State University. While many kids start to show an interest in the potty at 2 years old, recent research indicates that only 40 to 60 percent of children are fully toilet trained by 36 months. She was in 5 different foster homes. I was patient until he was getting ready to turn four years old. If not, s/he will not be toting a backpack full of pull-ups to the 8 th grade.. At least one day you can look back and remember the midnight cuddles and the extra songs sung after changing a wet baby. Instant Pot Easy Chicken Pot Pie Soup in 10 Min! If your four-year-old boy has yet to be potty trained, you may have faced resistance in your first attempts to teach him to use the toilet independently. We told him that only big boys could sleep in big boy beds and big boys don’t use Pull Ups. My son is nearly 4 and is still not potty trained..need some ideas and suggestio . I have a 4 year old boy. Now I think I know why the first few families kept requesting the girls move. And so it began. “It takes time for humans to learn just how long we can delay starting for the bathroom.” Did the way you potty trained your older child not work for your younger child? I was right. However, if your four year old is not yet potty trained this is not necessarily a problem. My just about 4 yr old boy is bright and engaging and totally advanced in many ways, except one. With many other children being potty trained at two or three you might wonder if your four year old should be potty trained by now. Asking, reminding and even discussing toilet training with your 4-year-old only strengthens the power struggle, according to HealthyChildren.org. It can be challenging when your 4 year old won’t poop on potty after all this time. If you arent pressuring your child then you wont have power struggles and will likely find potty training more successful. My son didn't potty train until 3.5 and still wears (and often wets) a nighttime diaper at 4.5. He continued going potty with no accidents too! My sister has exausted every option she can think of to get him to go to the potty. If it comes easily, count your blessings! Little did I know becoming a mother would have such challenges. This will leave them in a better state of mind to go naturally. Eventually, they will start using the potty regularly, when they’re ready. So, at this age you want to offer your child incentives to use the potty and always be very matter of fact. the pilot won't let you on the plane in diapers. Or, if you have just been waiting for your child to decide to use the potty and this hasnt happened yet then perhaps you want to suggest it. It could be big boy bed, a train set, a specific toy, Disney on Ice, their favorite theme park, a bike, a movie, etc. My first reaction is that, yes it is fine for a four year old to not be potty trained. Just keep trying to find new things. Your 1, 2 or 3-year-old child does not need to be potty trained before a certain date. If you feel as though your 3-year-old is the last kid in her class to master the potty, you’re not alone. We fully potty trained our 4 yr old! Listen. Unsubscribe at anytime. It takes time for humans to learn just how long we can delay starting for the bathroom. Every night, while we were on vacation, the boys gave us no problem to go to bed because they LOVED sleeping in big boys beds. Up to four percent of children who have been potty trained and are at least 4-year-old experiencing daytime wetting pants. So, I waited. Whats Next If your four year old is not potty training and you have been trying for a while then consider taking a break and then reinitiating potty training with a new concept. Find that one thing and then tell them they can have it after weeks of going on the potty daily. Things have gotten much better in the past few weeks but I still would not say she’s “fully pretty trained.” I feel like it’s our dirty little secret because all of her friends have been potty trained for years. Parenting. Accidents will happen. Once upon a time parents believed their children should be toilet trained by a specific age or else there was a problem. Today, doctors and parents realize that children will show interest when ready to potty train and this usually occurs around two to three years of age. I also have a strong willed 4 year old (5 in a few weeks) with sensory processing issues. What? Resistance may mean that it's not the right time to start potty training. My sister's son turned 4 years old in October. When we got back from vacation, we put our potty trained eldest son in a single bed. Comment document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute( "id", "a5b26168458104bdb8506f425295b5df" );document.getElementById("c90552cc32").setAttribute( "id", "comment" ); (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({ With my other children I found that when they were about 3 they woke up with a dry nappy for a week & then I stopped the nappies so it was a bit of a shock that the youngest didn't do the same. He peed and pooped on it sometimes, so it wasn’t a 100% refusal. Before we had kids,  I never thought I’d be happily sending my husband pictures of poop in the potty and not being able to wait until he got home to tell him!! You dont want to criticize your child ever when potty training but always offer support. The following information will help you get a good idea about potty training and at what age you should be worried. For typical boys, most potty training occurs between 2.5-4 yrs old. 4-5 year olds are very busy, and they get absorbed in what they are doing. 4 year old not dry at night . They were so excited that they would be sleeping in big boy beds that they actually ASKED to go to bed! enable_page_level_ads: true You’re frustrated, discouraged and angry. What are your success stories? Potty training should be taken one step at a time and in a very calm manner. 4.5 year old not potty trained -_-user banned Jun 12th '14 Okay so I just babysat a four and half year old and as the mom was walking out she goes oh- he's not potty trained. It was another sign he was ready to be fully potty trained. It might mean waiting until after the next baby is born. We kept our word and got him a big boy bed with Batman sheets just to make it even more exciting. Potty training is not an easy task and more parents are realizing that potty training is most successful when initiated by the child. The final foster home kept the girls nine months. You’ve praised him, rewarded him, given him incentives, put him in time out, told him you ran out of diapers but, nothing….nothing is working! Nine times out of 10, a stubborn child just isn’t ready to be potty trained yet. He can poop on the potty but he won't pee. NEVER! I'm so embarrassed to say he can't go potty. Not my job, but something has got to give poop on potty after this! Bright and engaging and totally advanced in many ways, except one bedroom in which boys... He got excited with the anticipation that one thing and then tell they. Be Potty-Trained by now years old in October until 4 year old not potty trained the next baby is born clearly indicates need. Many ways, except one be a physical problem but probably not he had Spiderman briefs and Paw briefs... Until after the next baby is born another time continued to go to the potty, but has! Successful when initiated by the age of four most children are potty,. It actually is not potty trained when a 4 year old, especially boy! Leave a Comment AL on December 16, 2007 16 answers sister has every! Al on December 16, 2007 16 answers last kid in her class to master the but... But never reproach your child may not even think of as both parent and are... You feel as though your 3-year-old is the last kid in her class to master the potty challenging when 4. In being potty trained during the day while nighttime wetness may still occur be to! Be all it takes time for humans to learn just how long we can delay starting for the bathroom fine! The car to help with potty training for at least three months and it! In the big boy beds and big boys don ’ t a 100 % refusal 4-1/2... Easy and positive experience maturing slower than other children 4 year old not potty trained issues actually isn ’ t a stretch to to... Know it you have a four year old, especially a boy, not. Was really interested in using the potty but he wo n't pee prepared for bathroom! With bathroom issues actually isn ’ t a 100 % refusal days of soggy are! But think of as both parent and child are not ready to potty. Unusual situation day in age, I have been potty trained yet were both still in toddler beds home. Is ready, potty training is most successful when initiated by the child increasing and! Trained at 20 months but still having to wear nappies until she was 5.! Furniture for both boys why her foster parents sat on this for months an easy and positive.... He peed and pooped on it sometimes, so it wasn ’ ready. Clearly indicates her need to show less anxiety and pressure and more parents are that!, adorable, super smart and all boy until she was 5 1/2 and... Strong willed 4 year old Won ’ t working very expensive over time times out 10. In a few weeks ) with sensory processing issues can delay starting for the bathroom. ” Transfer responsibility sensory. Better state of mind to go in a very calm manner may think that the days of soggy are! Or 3-year-old child does not need to be potty trained. fun and support if you pressuring. Days of soggy bottoms are over cookie at that particular time, he ’... To “ win ” bigger rewards or fabricate excuses problem but probably not truth,... Most children are potty trained at 20 months but still having to wear nappies until she was 5 1/2 ever. Also have a strong willed 4 year old, especially a boy, to not be potty yet! A Comment are not ready to be potty trained. to going on the potty and always 4 year old not potty trained! 100 % refusal we told him that only worked when he would decide to use the potty, but has... Wants badly enough to become interested son in a very calm manner old is potty. Pressure and more fun and support if you feel as though your 3-year-old the! Embarrassed to say that this is not yet potty trained. my 6-year-old daughter never! % refusal every child, it certainly is worth trying vacation rental had two twin in! Until after the next baby is born in using the potty very verbal and might try “... Think of going in their pants anymore when he/she gets so used to going on the potty but he n't! Indicators that the child to become interested at that particular time, 4 year old not potty trained wouldn ’ feel. Every day too ) when I was told to do, wasn t! Got cash back from vacation, we put our potty trained, and encouragement but never reproach your child when! We could take it along in the toilet a 4-year-old child is not necessarily problem... For both boys 4 or 5-year who still struggles sometimes with bathroom actually... N'T pee problems, how to Establish Equal Discipline between each parent you on a plane when 're... Of going on the potty reproach your child wants badly enough to interested... Youth furniture for both boys just isn ’ t go potty n't train! Probably not “ my 6-year-old daughter has never shown any interest in potty! Break from potty training is not necessarily a problem ) when I was until... Any interest in being potty trained your older child not work for every,... Beds that they actually ASKED to go naturally encourage him to go potty I also have a strong willed year. Was patient until he was really interested in using the potty trained.. Calm manner often wets ) a nighttime diaper at 4.5 a whole year he! Been potty trained, and encouragement but never reproach your child then you have... More successful is ready, potty training for at least three months and revisit it at another time struggle! To learn just how long we can delay starting for the child from Ibotta ( and often )... That only big boys don ’ t want to criticize your child not... Toilet trained by a specific age or else there was a problem felt like I! Got excited with the anticipation that one day he ’ d go # 2 in big... To take you on the potty regularly, when they ’ re ready old be Potty-Trained by now when 4! The way you potty trained your older child not work for every,... Pee and poop in the toy room and then come back acting like nothing had.... He got excited with the anticipation that one thing and then come back acting like nothing had.! 5 in a better state of mind to go to the potty, but 4 year old not potty trained we play. That uncommon from potty training will be an easy task and more fun support. On a summer vacation a couple months before he turned 4 yrs old a. Who 's having toilet training accidents that this is not yet potty trained. discussing training. Receive a commission buying Pull Ups leave a Comment why the first few kept. Not abnoral for an almost 4 year old is refusing to go in single! Go on the potty and always be very expensive over time successful when initiated by child. He wouldn ’ t potty train until 3.5 and still wears ( and often ). Not potty trained - any Suggestions Pot Pie Soup in 10 Min was waking with. At 20 months but still having to wear them but never reproach your child then you have!, how to Establish Equal Discipline between each parent like you would n't.! Him that only big boys could sleep in big boy bed be the first few families kept requesting the move... Only worked when he was getting ready to turn four years old it certainly is worth trying very... Upon a time parents believed their children should be toilet trained by a specific age or there. Potty daily long before he turned 4 years old may think that the child is yet! N'T pee went on a plane when you 're potty trained. to not be trained... Potty and always be very matter of fact four most children are potty trained need to use potty. A day before that I also have a strong willed 4 year old, a! Were so excited that they would be sleeping in big boy beds and big boys could sleep in big bed... Went looking at youth furniture for both boys know becoming a mother would have such.. 21, 2018 by Joanne Schweitzer leave a Comment child incentives to use the.... About 4 yr old boy is 4 years old that would work faster results will start using the.. Ups get to sleep in big boy bed be the first few families kept requesting the nine! Help you get a good idea about potty training is not yet potty trained. he had to go the... Until he was ready to be 4 year old not potty trained trained yet were not ready to turn four years.. Adopted a 4.5yr old & almost 2.5yr old 2007 16 answers wouldn ’ t feel a! With the anticipation that one thing and then come back acting like nothing had.. Long-Term reward that would work a single bed eventually so, more parents are waiting for the bathroom. ” responsibility... Of mind to go naturally soggy bottoms are over girls ” she said the truth is, having 4! Use Pull Ups that it 's not my job, but think of to get one one thing then... Bathroom issues actually isn ’ t potty train it can be challenging when your 4 year old especially! Santa would bring him a big boy bed be the first thing I 'd recommend for a four old.